I watched my own Mother suffer with pain, after my only sister passed away. She was 3 wks away from her 26th birthday. I saw Mom's pain, but I really didn't understand it. I watched helplessly, but didn't know what to say to comfort her. I was saddened by the loss of my dear sister. That was almost 30 yrs ago. I know now, how my Mom felt. I think maybe there's a small difference. My parents had 5 yrs to prepare for my sister's passing. I understand that doesn't make it less of a loss, but they knew it was inevitable, as she had a very new and incurable disease she was battling. My news was sudden and tragic. Totally unexpected for all of us. The kind of news you see on the news, or in movies, and you think to yourself, "OMG, I hope I never have to go through that". But, I know how my Mom felt, nonetheless, and I fully understand why she was "wailing" so loudly at my sister's viewing, in private. Sadly, upon learning of my own son's death, less than 12 hours later, I read that my little brother also lost his child to a sudden and very devastating car accident. His daughter had turned 23 in December, the same day as my Mom's birthday. And passed away on April 23rd, 2008, just 16 days before my own son's accident. How eerily ironic for us both. Our parents are both gone now too, so I'm doing what I can to be strong for my children and my brother and his children. I know that you never know "why" these things happen...but I constantly ask anyway. There'll never be a reason..a good one, a bad one, or an indifferent one. We just never know, "why?". I think that's what's keeping me down and unable to move forward. Someday that question will pass. Or at least I hope so.